Thursday, December 08, 2005

The Good Wife's Guide

There's was just a bit too much glee in hubby's eyes when he handed me this piece of paper yesterday. A "friend" of his had given it to him. Why, I cannot even attempt to guess. But I decided to post it here nonetheless - more as a lesson of what *not* to do than anything else.

From "Housekeeping Monthly", 13th May 1955

  • Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious
    meal ready on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you
    have be thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are
    hungry when they get home and the prospect of a good meal is part of the warm
    welcome needed.

  • Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he
    arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking.
    He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.

  • Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may
    need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.

  • Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the
    house just before your husband arrives. Run a dustcloth over the tables.

  • During the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for
    him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and
    order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering to his comfort will
    provide you with immense personal satisfaction.

  • Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the
    washer, dryer or vacuum. Encourage the children to be quiet.

  • Be happy to see him.

  • Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.

  • Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the
    moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics
    of conversation are more important than yours.

  • Don't greet him with complaints and problems.

  • Don't complain if he's late for dinner or even if he stays out all night.
    Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through at work.

  • Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or lie him
    down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.

  • Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing
    and pleasant voice.

  • Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or
    integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always
    exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question
    him.

  • A good wife always knows her place.

If you're a man - wipe that goddamn grin off your face.
If you're a woman - feel free to scream. I did.

Note: There are some rumors on the Net that this could be a fake. I actually disagree. I do believe it's very much real. Why? Because it goes hand in hand with the 50's philosophy - and I remember seeing an old black & white TV program, in which a young Jackie Kennedy (pre-White House, I believe) preached to the women of America about proper housewife etiquette and pretty much echoed above statements. It was bone-chilling to see...
posted by Simone at 9:19 AM | link | 4 comments